Learning to Sail

So I've been thinking about teamwork lately - and how I'm a better person when I'm in a team.

As an "only" child I grew up quite self-sufficient in entertaining myself and relying on myself and forming an opinion that "independence" was something I did by myself, for myself.

But as I move forward into my 40's I am seeing a new side of, "independence."

I am pleasantly surprised at how my "independence of spirit" is actually encouraged and enhanced by my connections to others. Wow! (This is sort of big for me).

With support and caring from others around me I can feel a distinct flow of energy that is actually working toward encouraging me to be my, "best self" and it helps me to move in the direction I want to move for my spirit.

Before, in the past, striving to be my, "best self" was something that I felt was a solitary endeavor -- that only "I" was able to achieve on my own (and the more lonely and stoic, the better!)

Connecting with others is still interesting for me but as I do more of it, and as I find the people I want to be connected with, I'm finding so much more energy to pursue the, "independence of my spirit" than when I was trying to sail without wind.

Basking in the Glow

Sometimes things go right in my life. Much more often, lately, than they ever did before.

When I look at this pear I see a ripe and contented creation of the universe that is comfortable in her skin.

She is nearing her prime -- when she will become ready to fall from the tree and provide nourishment for another creature -- but for now she is tending to her own needs.

The pear is receiving strength and energy from the sun and she is allowing it to help her grow.

The Present Beauty

This autumn country road is beautiful -- but I can't enjoy it. The road is curving up around the bend and I don't know where it's going. For a minor league control freak like me, that unknowing is quite unsettling.

I want to rush through this curve to see what it around the corner. I want to zoom by the gorgeous fall colors just to be certain that nothing bad is waiting for me around the bend. Intellectually I can see the colors of the trees and know that they are beautiful -- but I don't feel it. I am too busy being worried...

I am challenged to work on being in the "here and now" when change is impending.

It's easy for me to relax in the middle of July when summer is surrounding me but in the transition seasons I lose my grounding. I find myself nostalgic for the past and worrying about the future. It's a vicious circle that takes away all of my enjoyment of the present.

I strive to be able to pull up a Lazy-Boy chair in my mind, right there in the middle of the tall grass of this scene, and take time to breathe in the beauty I see around me to the deepest parts of my still un-trusting soul.

I want to enjoy the "here and now" before it so quickly becomes the "there and then."

To Be Cradled in Transition

Sometimes in life I just need to retreat and slow down everything. I need to turn off the chatter of daily life, and the chatter in my mind, and focus inward on more steady and stable truths.

I find I need this especially before new changes are about to occur. I seem to need the retreat time to nurture my self, and my soul, in preparation for the changes which often can be unsettling in their new unfamiliarity.

I "know" that change is good...that without change there would be stagnation...but nevertheless, my sensibilities still find the transition into change to be challenging...

I love this little acorn that is taking a rest in the comfort of the leaf -- the leaf which probably came from the same tree the acorn was from before it fell to the ground. The little acorn is gathering its energy to prepare for the next phase of its journey, that of becoming a magnificent tree, and it finds comfort in hanging on, for just a little while longer, to the old relationship with the leaf.

Soon the acorn *will* blow away and lodge itself in the earth to eventually become the tree it was meant to be, but for now -- it rests.

Do you give yourself time to slow down, retreat and gather your energies before new changes happen in your life?

The End is Only the Beginning

So Autumn is heavily upon us here in the northern midwest state of Ohio. I usually don't like the Fall season. It portends colder temperatures which I don't like and also the ending of flowers and meadows which I love so much. Fall actually brings me a bit of anxiety with it's process of ending the summer revelry...

But this photo is intriguing for me. I see it as two youngster leaves eager to join in the Fall festivities. Even before the older, elder leaves have begun their journey into wintertime and their next incarnation, the young leaves have jumped into the spirit of the season with full force.

What does this mean for me exactly? I'm not totally sure. Something about eager anticipation, the rush of youth, trust in the future, unconditional acceptance.

The juvenile leaves aren't afraid of the ending which Autumn signals -- they have embraced it as the beginning of an adventure into the unknown.

Lessons from a Grasshopper

You've gotta start somewhere... Just do it... One step at a time...

I watched this grasshopper for several minutes as she negotiated the challenge of the vertical obstacle she wanted to overcome.

Of course she could have jumped using all the power of her back legs. She's very good at jumping. But in this situation jumping would have led to a nice headache.

So instead, the grasshopper slowly and carefully stepped off of the piece of wood while reaching with her front legs.

She then used her back legs, the jumping legs, for support only. The grasshopper steadied herself for a few moments, with her jumping legs stilled, until she found her bearings and felt comfortable.

After some time the grasshopper felt strong enough to release the back leg of support and grasp the wall fully with all four of her legs.

She then scrambled up the wall and jumped over it to be rewarded with the open patch of grass on the other side.

Mutual Curiosity

I love my suburban backyard wildlife habitat....

This little chipmunk was so brave to peek around the fence slat to see what I was up to as I wandered around the backyard looking for photo-ops. She/he seemed to be saying, "Who are you? What are you doing? Do you have a family? What are you all about?"

Or maybe it was I who wondered those things about her/him! :)

Cycle of Renewal

There is pretty much nothing better than fresh fruit or vegetables right off the tree/bush/vine or whatever.

I took this luscious photo, "Apples in a Basket" in Russia, at the dacha house (summer cottage home). The dacha only has electricity and no running water. We spent our weekends there during my time in Russia and I loved every minute of it. This basket was filled in preparation to take back to the city so we could eat apples all week long.

My morning ritual at the dacha was to wake up and go outside to the "outhouse" and then pick a fresh apple right off the tree to eat as my morning toothbrushing session and breakfast appetizer.

As I walked the land and chomped on the fruit, knowing that when I was done I would throw the core onto the compost heap to later become sustenance for new growth, I relaxed into a calm sense of the tangible cycle of renewal of which, in my own small way, I was a part.

Cultural Eating

Well, I love eating in any case but cultural eating is even better! It's an adventure to try to new foods and explore new tastes.

This plate of Russian food was very tasty. I don't really know what everything was except that it was quite good!

(I'm still trying to tackle the Russian photos so hopefully I'll have more up to share very soon.)

A Place of Peace

So, I've been neglecting the blog once again! Right after coming back from Russia I made a quick (and wonderful) trip to Monterey, California. I've been busy!

I am not naturally a, "water person" so the ocean has never really pulled at my soul-strings but I must say that the scenery of the Californian coast is just utterly gorgeous. It's hard to capture it in a photo (but I tried). :)

I was much more soothed by the sound of the breathing ocean than I thought I would be. I always imagine scary and indefinite depths when I think of the ocean but as I walked along it's shores and absorbed it's pulse I felt the calming rhythm I've heard so much about...

Bless the Beasts

I'm back from Russia (I'm sorry to have left you hanging for so long, I should have said that I was going for 5 weeks) and I had an AMAZING and WONDERFUL and INCREDIBLE time and I would love nothing more than to share some of the 2800(!!) photos I took on the trip -- but first I have to share this video with you.

I'm not sure I've mentioned it yet -- really it was only a matter of time -- but the fact remains that I love wolves especially and bears too.

Wolves, bears and all animals speak to our spirits. They are integral parts of the web of life in which we live on this planet and finding respect for them is a basic foundation block of compassion and gratitude.

I'm baffled at how humans can express cruelty to fellow living creatures so remorselessly by stalking them until they are too exhausted to run anymore....

This video is devastating. I'm sorry it is disturbing. It is important.

To Russia with Love

I will be away from the blog for a few weeks since my husband and I are making a trip back to his homeland of Russia.

I love travelling and am very excited to see Russia from an insider's perspective.

I am armed with my camera in hand and hope to have lots and lots of photos for the blog upon my return!

Until then...

The Strength of Pink

When I was a girl and a teenager one of my favorite colors was pink. I know that is stereotypical -- for a girl to like pink -- but I fell right into the stereotype and had no problems with it.

In my twenties that changed. I felt pink was too "soft" whereas I needed to be "hard" in order to make it through college and out in the world. I started wearing darker colors and pink was set aside.

Ever since turning 40 a few months ago the color pink has, not so quietly, been making a comeback in my life. I've been drawn to it again and finding more ways to bring it into my life with my clothes and other items.

I am ready to soften. For my first 40 years I have done the things "they" expected of me. I can now return to being who *I* want to be. I know I can take care of myself -- I've done it. The softness of pink does not make me vulnerable...

Sunday Meditation -- The Future Is Just around the Bend

Theory in Action

Ever since I was a little girl I was entralled with experiential learning. I remember hearing the information about where milk comes from but until I went to a farm and actually *saw* the milk coming *from* cows it just didn't make sense to me. Maybe I like to see the proof of what I'm told is true...

Another of those examples, where I become intrigued with the reality of what I was taught to believe is true, is about flowers and pollen. I heard, learned and "know" that birds, bees, insects and any other small critters transport pollen from flower to flower in order to fertilize them but until I truly witness it with my own eyes the notion seems like just a lofty ideal.

But it's true! This little green bug was calmly travelling from day lily to day lily as I snapped his picture. He didn't mind me and just kept going along with his business. I figured he was drinking nectar from the heart of the flowers but until I uploaded the photos and looked closely I didn't see that he served another purpose.

If you click on the photo you can see more clearly the pollen stuck to his antennae that he takes with him to other flowers.

Little Sparrow

Potential

"And the day came
when the risk to remain tight in the bud
was more painful
than the risk it took to blossom."
-- Anais Nin

Right Timing

We've been watching a Robin's nest out our front window for a few weeks now. We somehow missed the construction of the nest but we were there to see the fledglings begging for food and the two parent birds tag-teaming as they rotated bringing worms to the chicks.


Now the progeny are getting bigger. One at a time each of the three baby birds perch on top of the nest and practice spreading their never-used-before wings as they watch the devoted process of the parents leaving and returning to the nest over and over to bring them food.


I can sense the anticipation of the one courageous youngster who claims the top-of-the-nest position. As the parents fly away she follows the adult bird's movements with her eyes. Her body even attempts to mimic the behavior but at the very last moment she holds herself back and stays safely ensconced in the nest for a little while longer. She is learning what needs to be done but is not quite ready to do it.


And that need to wait is natural and understandable. The bird trusts herself and her instincts and she understands that she will feel and know when her right time to take action has come. And it is at that right time that she will spread her wings, follow her parents away from the nest and fly...

Sunday Meditation -- Dock to Eternity

Morning Glory Mornings

There are few things better than waking up on a Saturday morning in the summer time. The fan is gently rotating overhead, the sun is curiously peeking through the blinds and the birds are happily sing-songing as they search for worms and food.

I wake up feeling like a Morning Glory -- bright-eyed and eager to face the day's activities. Errands, cleaning, fixing, mowing....it's a long list but in the summertime it's a welcome way to pass the time throughout a day that is sunny, warm and inviting.

Butterfly Posing

This gorgeous Yellowtail butterfly sat there and posed for me so beautifully yesterday. It must have been soaking in the sunshine since I don't think there was any nectar for it to drink from the green leaves on which it was resting.

Although I don't know much about the habits and behavior of insects (or other creatures in nature) I still enjoy it all very much!

Beginnings

"It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful. There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."
-- Alan Cohen

Wordless Wednesday

The Grounding Colors

For many years I have been attracted to the colors green and brown. The "earthy" colors and tones that make me feel grounded and stable. My living room is full of green and brown (and a splash of blue too -- for the sky).

Spending time in nature and seeing the real greens and browns is the most grounding experience of all. Breathing deeply, when out in nature, I breathe in stability, calm and peace.

Out from Hiding

Yesterday I went to Forest Hill Park in the morning and not only did I see a baby fox (of which I wasn't, unfortunately, able to get a photo) but I also saw this gorgeous deer. He was walking slowly and didn't seem to be too frightened.

I am still so amazed that my urban park is so wild. I hope the animals I see there are able to survive. It is quite a small space where they are trying to live.

Any glee I feel at seeing them is tempered by worry that they are so encircled by humans and city life.

Sunday Meditation

View from a New Mexican ant's perspective.

Pretty in Purple

Nature's Fireworks

Happy Fourth of July -- to those who celebrate it!

Breath of Country Air

I love seeing traditional country scenes. I live in the suburbs so country scenes are a not an everyday occurence for me.

Country scenes bring me a sense of peace and simplicity and without saying a word they remind me to just breeaatthheee.

Deeper Meanings

So I have a confession to make -- I love macro! I love how the tiniest details become apparent and even obvious where once they were lost within the larger vision of the, "whole."

Seeing too many details can sometimes become overwhelming but at other times it keeps me humbled as to the intricate and complicated deeper level of things. There always seems to be, "more" than what I see upon first glance.

It's a lesson for me in not being judgmental. Judgments are quick and easy. Judgments are the quick glance I cast to my world. Digging deeper, looking closely, seeing the more intricate and complicated parts may take more time and effort but in pushing beyond the initial judgments I am able to see more of the truth.

Delicate Morning Dew

It's amazing what you can see when you get up early and get out into the world. I've always been an early bird -- waking up at, "the crack of dawn" is my natural rhythm --and when I take a camera with me the stillness of the morning hours is exaggerated so that the littlest things I might never notice otherwise become larger than life.

Natural Health

I think gazing at this lovely arrangement of flowers is similar to gazing at a fish tank full of fish -- it lowers my blood pressure!

Sunday Meditation -- Misty Morning Sunrise

Splash of Color

This daisy (and more like it) are what I see out my dining room window. It's part of my neighbor's container garden that is set next to her vine-covered house. She is gracious to let me explore her garden for photo-ops!

Keeping Watch

This papa (or mama) goose kept a keen eye on me while its goslings pecked around under the water for food. While other adult geese around dove below for food this vigilant one did not. This goose took it's job seriously -- that of protecting the gaggle.

Balancing of Opposites

I'm not exactly sure why but I often seem to be intrigued by the combination of flowers and stone. I think it's something about the "hardness" and "softness" that come together and are made better (or at least more interesting) because of the pairing.

When they are together the flowers are not seen by me as, "too delicate" and the stone is not seen as, "too sturdy." Together they create a balance and each aspect is valuable and necessary...

Cushioned in Pink

Another pleasing shot I got at "my" Forest Hill Park.

Drama in the Sky

I've been meaning to get this picture uploaded since I took it a couple weeks ago. Oh, the drama of it all! Clashing cold fronts and warm fronts, interplay of dark and light, producing winds and rains and sometimes lightning and thunder.

But behind it all is the steady blue sky and shining sun waiting patiently for the lower altitude drama to tire itself out...

The Charm of Simplicity

I've returned to exploring my suburban backyard. These delicate little flowers are back in force. (I need to learn the names of the things I see!) Each flower is only about the size of a pea.

I love getting down on the ground to see them up close and to see the world from their perspective. Each tiny bloom looks so sweet to me. They have soft blue and pink coloring and could easily be overlooked if only viewed from afar.

Close up though, each flower takes on its own space and unique place in the universe. Each flower is no more or no less allowed to fill and participate in that unique space than any other flower. The petite blossoms simply are...

More City Oasis Wonderfulness

I am loving my local Forest Hill Park and since today is a gorgeous June day I will go there for another walk a little later on.

Just thought I'd throw up another photo from a recent walk. I'm not really sure what this specific representative of flora is called but upon further inspection it is quite intriguing with it's multitude of baby buds swaying in the summer wind.

New Growth from Old

Yesterday on my walk through my new favorite place, Forest Hill Park, I came across an old tree trunk that was no longer a tree. It had been cut down (or fell down) so that the remaining trunk was about as tall as I am.

Although the trunk was no longer the huge tree it surely must have been once it still has its old kick in it since it is sprouting out some new growth.

I love how nature can just, "keep on going." It takes a hit, like being cut down, but doesn't give up entirely. The urge is to continue growing no matter what adversity it faces...and survives.

City Oasis Meadow Flowers

I have an urban oasis city park called, "Forest Hill Park" located about a mile away from where I live. This park was given to the city by John D. Rockefeller many years ago and at that time it was stipulated that the park always remain as such. I've been walking the paths in the park for years but last year I found a dirt trail path hidden in the woods.

When I walk the dirt path there is a ravine and a brook at the bottom. There are water falls and hidden corners. When I am immersed in the woods I can not hear any of the street noises that are invariably still going on around me. It takes me about an hour (at a fast pace!) to walk the entire trail. It is amazing to me that this slice of quiet nature is tucked within the bustling suburb/city.

Luminous Lupines

Baby Squirrel

Ever since we started started making an effort to feed the squirrels a few years ago we have been raising families of them ever since. It's alternately the cutest thing I've seen and annoying when they persist in urinating on our porch...

Anyway, this little guy was trying to taunt the dog but it was still too young and scared to really make an impact. Give it a couple more weeks and it will be almost as big as a cat (we breed very large squirrels here in northern Ohio!) and will certainly give the dog a run for her money!

Through the Fence

I've been working on what I'm calling, "Property Exploration." This is where I scrounge around the limits of my suburban property looking for photo opportunities. I am exploring what I have right in, "my own backyard" instead of thinking the grass is always greener somewhere else.

This is working on the specific lesson in photography that HOW I see is more important that WHAT I see (and of course this lesson can be applied in a broader sense to my whole life!)

I am taking the time to look again, to look more closely, to look with more curiosity, to look with a sense of wonder, to look and be grateful....

View from My Kitchen Window

This is what I see when I'm doing dishes in the early morning hours of spring.

It's my neighbor's gargage and his old fence that are nestled together with a blooming lilac bush.

Such a pleasing sight!

Sweet and Delicate

There was a bumper crop of Lilies of the Valley this year. I'm not sure what the weather and climate did just right but the conditions must have been perfect to produce the plentiful beautiful flowers I had.

I've been tempted to pull out this row of Lilies of the Valley since for the past five years they weren't producing much of any susbtantial blooms.

And then this year I was completely surprised by an abundance of gorgeous and healthy flowers.

It's another lesson about patience and even faith. I don't seek out those learning opportunities very often so when they come to me unsolicited (and I am a aware enough to pick up on the message being sent to me!) it certainly must be important.

I'm glad I didn't pull out the Lilies of the Valley.

Staring Match

This gorgeous squirrel sat there and stared at me like it owned the tree. Of course in her world, from her perspective, she does "own" the tree!

Spring is all around me now. The flowers are blooming, the birds are singing and the critters are coming out from there underground spaces.

The feeders are filled and my backyard suburban ecosystem is entering the busy season. I am content.